Author Topic: REALLY Bad Jokes (Read 178966 times)

StromGeeza · « **Reply #1160 on:** July 25, 2022, 08:06:53 »

Looks like your wallet got battered, Rusty.

Rusty Nuts · « **Reply #1161 on:** July 25, 2022, 08:37:15 »

Joe Rocket · « **Reply #1162 on:** July 25, 2022, 21:29:45 »

Scientists have investigated for decades how dolphins communicate in their own language.

Suddenly it clicked.......

kwackboy · « **Reply #1163 on:** July 26, 2022, 09:38:08 »

I got a new job delivering medication to pigs, sheep, goats, cows and chickens.

I'm now a "Farm Assist"

mr_diver · « **Reply #1164 on:** July 26, 2022, 18:33:59 »

kwackboy · « **Reply #1165 on:** July 28, 2022, 06:25:58 »

Had to quit my job at the Watch factory
The bloke sitting opposite kept making faces...

Hugo Magnus · « **Reply #1166 on:** July 28, 2022, 06:57:58 »

......My wife said he wouldn't keep his hands off her, he did it for a wind up.

Hugo Magnus · « **Reply #1167 on:** July 30, 2022, 07:45:58 »

I am writing a book about reverse psychology.

Please don't buy it.

Barbel Mick · « **Reply #1168 on:** July 30, 2022, 10:16:20 »

I've been banned from playing the guitar at home.............I'm not going to fret over it though!

Mr Nick · « **Reply #1169 on:** August 01, 2022, 15:43:39 »

Men: ”football's coming home, it’s coming home!”

Women 60 yrs later: "oh for goodness sake, we’ll fetch it ourselves!”

Rookie · « **Reply #1170 on:** August 01, 2022, 21:40:30 »

Drama in the commonwealth games today. Someone was shot with a starter pistol........They think it was race related.

Mr Nick · « **Reply #1171 on:** August 02, 2022, 15:53:25 »

Only too true...

MartinW · « **Reply #1172 on:** August 02, 2022, 20:03:05 »

TLP will be "offended", he thinks you have to say "outraged".

mr_diver · « **Reply #1173 on:** August 05, 2022, 07:33:17 »

SteveO · « **Reply #1174 on:** August 09, 2022, 19:33:37 »

Youngman · « **Reply #1175 on:** August 11, 2022, 13:48:53 »

Yesterday I was driving on the A24 doing 70 mph when this red Fireblade pulls alongside and the rider taps urgently on my window.
I thought WTF and roll the window down fast.
The bloke's wearing an open face helmet and has a ciggy hanging from his mouth.
Still doing 70 he leans into the open window and says “Have you got a light mate?”
"Whaaat?" I reply “Are you trying to kill yourself?”
"Oh don't worry" he says "I only smoke ten a day.”

MartinW · « **Reply #1176 on:** August 14, 2022, 15:57:05 »

Not easy.

kwackboy · « **Reply #1177 on:** August 14, 2022, 20:25:23 »

Next week is Diarrhea Awareness Week.

Runs until Friday.....

kwackboy · « **Reply #1178 on:** August 19, 2022, 15:09:08 »

Just started reading a book called “Swimming The English Channel” by Francis Near.

SteveO · « **Reply #1179 on:** August 24, 2022, 21:44:25 »