Author Topic: REALLY Bad Jokes (Read 179153 times)

2112 · « **Reply #1101 on:** May 04, 2022, 20:56:46 »

I wonder how Boris Becker is holding up to the pressure of the men's semi's in prison ???

Rusty Nuts · « **Reply #1102 on:** May 04, 2022, 21:47:22 »

Probably finding it hard.

MartinW · « **Reply #1103 on:** May 04, 2022, 21:49:16 »

When three people have sex it is known as a threesome.

When two people have sex it is known as a twosome.

Now I know why you are handsome.

Brockett · « **Reply #1104 on:** May 05, 2022, 20:47:18 »

'footer' seen on a Honda forum:-
" if it ain't broke, keep fixing it until it is"

I think that's me to a "T"

Asmith61 · « **Reply #1105 on:** May 06, 2022, 07:40:14 »

You have got to love geography

Graham62 · « **Reply #1106 on:** May 06, 2022, 08:20:26 »

And the sh*t state of the country.

Keith60 · « **Reply #1107 on:** May 06, 2022, 17:00:03 »

Yesterday I thought It’s a nice day so I’ll take the bike out , whilst out I got in a race with a Harley Davidson , at first on the flat straight roads I had the upper hand and could stay in front quite comfortably then we hit the down hill straight and that’s when he over took me and took quite a lead , I thought I’d never catch up but when it came to the twisty uphill roads I was really on his tail , I had to pedal like mad but I managed to get back in front 🚴‍♀️

MartinW · « **Reply #1108 on:** May 06, 2022, 18:09:22 »

Coat collected.

Mr Nick · « **Reply #1109 on:** May 07, 2022, 10:11:32 »

Joe Rocket · « **Reply #1110 on:** May 19, 2022, 12:20:17 »

Jess, the talking sheep dog, finished coaxing the flock of sheep into the pen and pushed the gate shut with her snout. She then went to the farmer and told him "I've put your 50 sheep in the pen". The farmer said "I only have 46 sheep though". "Yes" replied Jess "but I rounded them up".

Barbel Mick · « **Reply #1111 on:** May 19, 2022, 12:42:22 »

Just had two police officers at my front door. They asked me, “Are you familiar with the letters HB?” I said, “No, I’m not.”
“How about LS?” they asked. I replied, “No.”
Then they asked, “What about JD?”
I said, “Hang on a minute, am I a suspect or something?” They said, “No, these are just initial inquiries.”

kwackboy · « **Reply #1112 on:** May 19, 2022, 20:44:32 »

MartinW · « **Reply #1113 on:** May 19, 2022, 21:04:56 »

That's a lot of free extras, so it won't be in a Lidl box.

MartinW · « **Reply #1114 on:** May 20, 2022, 10:44:28 »

Elton John has bought a treadmill for his pet rabbit.

He's a little fit bunny.

Hugo Magnus · « **Reply #1115 on:** May 20, 2022, 12:08:39 »

Was thinking today, when I was young, we were so poor we couldn’t afford shoes,

I used to wrap my feet in bubble wrap so I could pop to the shop

kwackboy · « **Reply #1116 on:** May 22, 2022, 13:42:58 »

I think shredded cheese should be banned in England.

Make Britain grate again.

kwackboy · « **Reply #1117 on:** May 24, 2022, 19:55:02 »

MartinW · « **Reply #1118 on:** May 25, 2022, 21:34:59 »

Football.

kwackboy · « **Reply #1119 on:** May 27, 2022, 19:09:40 »