Author Topic: REALLY Bad Jokes  (Read 137522 times)

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Offline The Doctor 46

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Re: REALLY Bad Jokes
« Reply #1680 on: March 15, 2024, 16:26:00 »
I worked with a young lady who when referring to her sister she called her "Butter Legs". She said she spread them as often as butter. Honestly.  :roll:
Without rain, there would be no rainbows.

Offline The Doctor 46

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Re: REALLY Bad Jokes
« Reply #1681 on: March 15, 2024, 21:41:27 »
Taken from the internet but these are some funny one liners.  :grin:

 What do you call a pony with a cough?

A little horse.

• What did one hat say to the other?

You wait here. I’ll go on a head.

• What do you call a magic dog?

A labracadabrador.

• What did the shark say when he ate the clownfish?

This tastes a little funny.

• What’s orange and sounds like a carrot?

A parrot.

• Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom?

Because the “P” is silent.

• What do you call a woman with one leg?

Eileen.

• What did the pirate say when he turned 80?

Aye matey.

• Why did the frog take the bus to work today?

His car got toad away.

• What did the buffalo say when his son left for college?

Bison.

• What is an astronaut’s favourite part on a computer?

The space bar.

• Why did the yogurt go to the art exhibition?

Because it was cultured.

• What do you call an apology written in dots and dashes?

Re-Morse code.

• Did you hear about the two people who stole a calendar?

They each got six months.
Without rain, there would be no rainbows.

Offline MartinW

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Re: REALLY Bad Jokes
« Reply #1682 on: March 16, 2024, 09:34:34 »
These bikes are shi.....
Tall, Dark and Handsome (In 1987) - Just tall now !!

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Offline MartinW

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Re: REALLY Bad Jokes
« Reply #1683 on: March 16, 2024, 09:35:33 »
I've just done an online speeding course.

I was on Zoom.
Tall, Dark and Handsome (In 1987) - Just tall now !!

Chief Stasi


Offline Brockett

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Re: REALLY Bad Jokes
« Reply #1684 on: March 20, 2024, 10:24:36 »
Sorry not a joke but ... I just read a headline - a police office assualted an inspector he found having sex with his wife in a SCREWFIX car park.
This doesn't last forever, so do it while you can.

Offline Rusty Nuts

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Re: REALLY Bad Jokes
« Reply #1685 on: March 20, 2024, 12:00:17 »
Yes, saw that. Made me snigger like a 4th former.

Offline The Doctor 46

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Re: REALLY Bad Jokes
« Reply #1686 on: April 22, 2024, 14:34:06 »
I ordered a chicken and an egg online.

I’ll let you know what comes first.

I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.
Without rain, there would be no rainbows.

Offline Joe Rocket

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Re: REALLY Bad Jokes
« Reply #1687 on: April 22, 2024, 16:50:09 »
Have you tried blindfolded archery? You ought to, you don't know what you're missing.......
So how's it going so far then?

Offline crump

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Re: REALLY Bad Jokes
« Reply #1688 on: April 22, 2024, 18:59:15 »
Found a great site online that sells sausages.....I'll send you a link.

Offline MartinW

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Re: REALLY Bad Jokes
« Reply #1689 on: April 26, 2024, 10:05:44 »
.
Tall, Dark and Handsome (In 1987) - Just tall now !!

Chief Stasi


Offline MartinW

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Re: REALLY Bad Jokes
« Reply #1690 on: April 26, 2024, 10:06:06 »
.
Tall, Dark and Handsome (In 1987) - Just tall now !!

Chief Stasi


Offline Barbel Mick

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Re: REALLY Bad Jokes
« Reply #1691 on: April 29, 2024, 16:08:53 »
We've just eaten our Christmas dinner.
I don't think these slow cookers are as good as they're made out to be.
Mick

Retired Breakfast Tester and semi professional tumbler.

Offline The Doctor 46

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Re: REALLY Bad Jokes
« Reply #1692 on: May 02, 2024, 18:55:35 »
I always give my bike hay. It improves horse power.  :lala:
Without rain, there would be no rainbows.

Offline Hugo Magnus

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Re: REALLY Bad Jokes
« Reply #1693 on: May 03, 2024, 08:39:38 »
...and it's green
The interruptions ARE the journey  (Ted Simon)



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Offline Joe Rocket

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Re: REALLY Bad Jokes
« Reply #1694 on: May 07, 2024, 18:28:48 »
A man went to the Doctor's with a sore bottom.

"Where exactly is it sore?" asked the Doctor.

"Around the entrance," replied the man "what do you think?"

"I think it will sore for as long as you call it an entrance" said the Doctor.
So how's it going so far then?

Offline The Doctor 46

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Re: REALLY Bad Jokes
« Reply #1695 on: May 11, 2024, 20:05:29 »
Not really a joke but,

The motorcyclist.

“He starts the game with a full pot o’ luck and an empty pot o’ experience... The object is to fill the pot of experience before you empty the pot of luck.”  :thumb:
Without rain, there would be no rainbows.