Author Topic: The moaning old git thread (Read 323732 times)

Captain Sensible · « **Reply #40 on:** June 26, 2012, 14:30:57 »

Why oh why did the fella who decided to keep chickens a few doors up from me decide (reasonable) get a flipping cockerel as well (unreasonable) ? If you've never heard a cockerel crowing a few houses away from you well just be glad you have never heard one!

Why doesn't anyone else besides me think this is an anti social load of old ********** thing to do? What a load of weak lilly livered bunch of southern ****tas that they are down here - no one says anything!

I ask you

Dave

Fat Rat · « **Reply #41 on:** June 26, 2012, 14:59:05 »

Chickens? luxury!! You want to try being woken up at 5am with a dozen Donkeys calling each other across the fields

Oh, and if one shits on your head you would notice it more than if a Chicken did

Strombone · « **Reply #42 on:** June 26, 2012, 15:47:13 »

Yes! her is another one: Buddy! How did that one creep in?

frez · « **Reply #43 on:** June 26, 2012, 15:57:47 »

A surcharge for paying by card when there is no alternative but to pay by credit/debit card.

Piglumps · « **Reply #44 on:** June 26, 2012, 16:09:42 »

Quote from: "Fat Rat"

Oh, and if one shits on your head you would notice it more than if a Chicken did

Why and how you should find yourself in THAT situation is worth a thread to itself!

Me again:

Buddy! Ha. That means something with many buds..

Issues: People don't have issues, magazines have issues. People have or don't have problems.

'Going forward': What the Hell does 'going forward' mean? It's not like you have a choice.

Stupid made-up dog breeds: Labradoodle? Cockerpoo? Just wrong. Plain wrong.

Magazine issues: Why does the August issue of Bike, Ride, Tractor & Machinery, Dogs & Dogging etc get published on the 3rd of June for Pete's sake?

Staycation. No. That is not a bloody 'staycation', it's a day off. Have a word with yourself!

And the next person who tells me I have anger issues..........

Strombone · « **Reply #45 on:** June 26, 2012, 16:13:09 »

Well, you know, it is what it is.

frez · « **Reply #46 on:** June 26, 2012, 16:16:00 »

I can kind of understand people using "lol" in online chat, text messaging and the like where space or effort might be at a premium, but people actually saying "lol" when they are not laughing is rediculous.

Piglumps · « **Reply #47 on:** June 26, 2012, 16:19:17 »

Quote from: "frez"

A surcharge for paying by card when there is no alternative but to pay by credit/debit card.

On a similar line: You go online to book some tickets for a concert. You click on the tickets, 4 at £25 each. You then proceed to the checkout, then there's a booking fee, a performance charge, a sum for postage and packing (usually £4 per ticket), a levy on using a card, a fee for being between 18 and 900 years old, another for choosing seats that face the stage.

Total bill for 4 £25 tickets: £180!

Oooh, ooh. 'This is Elsie, she's 96 years young.' No. She's 96 years old, 96 years of age (what else do you measure in years then?)..

TV presenter: "And I'd like to welcome everyone's favourite footballer, Gary Neville." Bit of an assumption there isn't it?

This is one of the best threads so far.

Piglumps · « **Reply #48 on:** June 26, 2012, 16:19:54 »

Welcome everyone to v-cross.co.uk .

frez · « **Reply #49 on:** June 26, 2012, 16:22:51 »

Just exactly what is a "rest room". If I'm pushing out a log I'm not resting...

Piglumps · « **Reply #50 on:** June 26, 2012, 16:26:38 »

Oh, and completely unmatched road tests in car and bike magazines: "This month, The Vauxhall Insignia 2.0CDTi Exclusive Sports Tourer, versus the Suzuki DL650A L2 against a small dog toy, the Good Boy Moppy Loofah." (that's a real dog toy too.) If that test was in Bike the Triumph would win.

Fat Rat · « **Reply #51 on:** June 26, 2012, 16:50:04 »

I had a company in England offering me their advertising services for the 'V acations' I offer. WTF is a v acation?

Edit: I've just been caught by my own Americanism filter

Strombone · « **Reply #52 on:** June 26, 2012, 16:53:52 »

Quote from: "frez"

Just exactly what is a "rest room". If I'm pushing out a log I'm not resting...

Your right. It's a bathroom, wear you can often find me taking a comfort brake ;)

Piglumps · « **Reply #53 on:** June 26, 2012, 17:20:03 »

So, a comfort break? That's a break from being comfortable. Why would I want this?

Fat Rat · « **Reply #54 on:** June 26, 2012, 17:51:09 »

My last one of the day (maybe)..

I am selling a car at the moment (anyone want a SWB 2.8TD Pajero with blown Head Gasket?)

Why do people insist on asking 'How much for cash'? What other means were they considering on paying, their last born child??

Strombone · « **Reply #55 on:** June 26, 2012, 18:15:14 »

Quote from: "Fat Rat"

My last one of the day (maybe)..

It's your call...

Piglumps · « **Reply #56 on:** June 26, 2012, 18:22:50 »

My last for the day lest I should explode: People that use capital letters inappropriately, or is Head Gasket a job title? Lucky him, he got blown!

Strombone · « **Reply #57 on:** June 26, 2012, 19:10:25 »

I am wearing my pants under my pants. Or am I wearing my pants over my pants? I'm no longer sure. It's so confusing these days!

Maybe that's why I frequently see blokes walking around with their pants(?) halfway down their arse, exposing their pants to all and sundry.

It's all just pants!

MartinW · « **Reply #58 on:** June 26, 2012, 19:31:36 »

Women only short lists, what are they all about ?

I can't understand how these are legal within the so called equality legislation.

Should we not be giving the job to the candidate best equipped to do the role, rather than just give the job to a woman. If the woman is the best candidate, then great, let's give her the job and see it get done well. There are some exceptional women running businesses in this country, who got the job despite there being male applicants, not just because there weren't any male applicants.

That's the way it should be .....

Fat Rat · « **Reply #59 on:** June 26, 2012, 20:09:42 »

Quote from: "Piglumps"

People that use capital letters inappropriately, or is Head Gasket a job title?

It is the name of something my friend therefore appropriate use of capital letters